comfort-end-of-life

How to Support Someone Grieving a Loss

 

comfort-end-of-life

Image by StockSnap from Pixabay

Knowing the right way to support a grieving colleague, friend, or relative can be quite hard. You might be afraid to make a mistake, so sometimes, people don’t just speak, leaving the bereaved individuals feeling alone and isolated. If you have not experienced loss, you might not have a realistic expectation of how the bereaved feel or when they can go back to their normal daily activity or move on. In this blog, we will explore how you can support a grieving person. 

Reach out

Calling to express your sympathy is an excellent way of supporting grieving individuals. However, don’t say phrases such as ‘’it is for the best’ or ‘it is God’s will’ unless said by the bereaved. Your relative or friend might need you more even after the first few weeks and months when others have stopped calling. Check in frequently and say hello. Many people going through grief find it hard to reach out, so you need to take the initiative. 

Listen more

One of the ways to help your grieving friend or family is to listen. Let them express themselves and talk about whatever they need. It might include angry outbursts, crying, expressions of regret or guilt, laughing, screaming, or performing stress reduction activities, such as gardening or walking. Concentrate on listening carefully with compassion. 

 

Since every person grieves differently, allow them to grieve how they can. Don’t dispute or judge how they respond to the loss. If they are not open to talking, then allow them to be. The aim is to comfort them with your presence. Sitting and not talking can also be helpful. Remember that the human touch is a powerful tool. Offering a hug or just holding hands can help. However, ensure they are okay before proceeding. 

Provide hope

Individuals who have gone through the grieving process remember people who offered hope and helped them turn from pain to a new sense of life, the assurance that things will get better. However, ensure you don’t appear too glib. Instead, speak in a way that acknowledges their issues and also affirms confidence in the improvement of the situation. 

Offer practical help

It can be quite hard for grieving individuals to ask for help. They might feel guilty about it, feel too depressed to reach out, or even feel they are a burden to others. They might not even have the motivation or energy to call you if they need help. Instead, try offering assistance. 

 

This is actionable and shows that you are there for them through the ride and as long as it will take. You can do this in several practical ways, such as helping with the funeral arrangements, whether it is planning a traditional burial or assisting with cremation services, running errands, watching or helping to pick up their children. 

Endnote

Though grief can be painful, many individuals will find that the support of friends and family can help them gradually learn to live with the loss of a loved one and not seek professional help. However, if the circumstances resulting in the death of a loved one are distressing, like an unexpected, sudden, or traumatic death, then you can suggest your relative or family seek professional help. 

 

 

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Last Updated on January 31, 2025 by Marie Benz MD FAAD